Looking into the mirror

Acceptance... a word with such meaning. Unfortunately it´s something that many of us never achieve. Acceptance of who we are, where we are going, what has happened in our lives. I´ve always said that if only we could have a switch that we could use to turn off our emotions. There have been many times that I wish I could just move on and forget about something...but I know that will never happen... and now I just try to internalise and rationalise that what happens in life, happens, and it is helping to mould me into a stronger and better person.

For the past 2 months I have been taking a really harsh look at myself and my life... The psychologist in me will never keep quiet... and what I have realised is that life is now, not yesterday and not tomorrow. I have spent far too much time looking backwards and then looking forwards... I bypass today. And even though my personal mantra is supposed to be Carpe Diem... I don´t use it! I worry too much... too much about having been hurt, too much about the possibility of being hurt, and always always about what people think.

So, I need to accept myself, and let go of my demons. My mum has always said, my biggest enemy is myself. I have been trapped in the prison of my mind for too long.. I´ve not been enjoying life recently and it´s time I wake up and realise how truly lucky I am. I may not be the prettiest, funniest, smartest girl in the world, but I was given what I was given, and I have to accept it, use it and make the most of life...it could all be over in the blink of an eye.